L'esprit de l'escalier

It's all about the timing.

Name:
Location: Memphis, Tennessee, United States

I'd rather be somewhere else most of the time and I'm a huge practitioner of staircase wit.

1/13/2005

Changing Names, Changing Faces

It's so easy to make yourself anonymous in the blog-world that I feel guilty taking advantage of that fact. I created a blog a few months ago and told a couple people about it, namely my husband. I decided last night though, I shouldn't have done that. I need a place where I can write uninhibited and I couldn't do that knowing he'd be scrutinizing every piece of anything I posted about.

"Why'd you decide to write about him again?"
"You sound like a needy fat girl (I should say here that I am pretty much a needy fat girl (working on the fat part daily), but when he says that in the realm of constructive criticism he's using the bridget jones stereotype which i do NOT want to be and would never admit to being) when you write about that."
"That makes you sound so immature."
"That's not how you talk, why do you write that way?"

I can't deal w/all the questions. I want to take his criticism and use it to my advantage, I don't want to sound like an idiot, but I tend to do just that when I know I've got an audience. Also, he doesn't like the same types of authors I like, so why should he like my own writing style? It's okay if he doesn't, I'm not writing for him, I'm writing for me. So, I've decided to take my blogging elsewhere and it will be all for me. Mine and mine alone. I need this.

Now, let me give you a disclaimer for what I just said. My husband is not trying to make me feel bad or be mean when he comments negatively on something I've done. I know this, which is why I try not to get upset with him when he's being painfully honest. He can't help it, and it's part of his "charm?". But sometimes I find it affecting me in a bad way rather than the good, self-improvement kind of way he intended. In those cases, I must pull myself away from the situation in order to think rationally. Here is where I will do just that.

People often refer to the Internet as if it is their friend. Like, they'll say, "Hey, Internet, what up!" or, "Internet, I told you to quit sending me hatemails, why do you persist??" I don't know how comfortable I am with that, but seeing as how I've managed to chase away every friend I used to have, I'm going to have to resort to just that. Internet, you mean a lot to me, I need you right now, and you're the only one listening. Thanks for that.

I'll tell you more about the friends another day. Hopefully, you'll have some pointers because if I don't find some real people to talk to soon I might go insane. I can only keep up this charade of happiness for so long.

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